Jack Goggin
Today an old family friend passed away. He was 87 yrs old. Probably way too old to remember. Way to old to have others care about any more. Way too old to make an impression. Way too old to matter, huh? You'd be wrong on all counts when it came to this man. Next to my father, he was the single most important influence on me as a young man. He and my father were good friends. He was one of the few people that my father loved or truly admired in life; my father spoke of him with profound affection many times to me. You could hear the deep effect and impression he made on him. Jack Goggin. Jack possessed a beautiful quiet strength, not only of mind and body, but of spiritual character; God he was strong man. He was one of those people whose presence brought order and comfort out of chaos. Trustworthy. The very epitome of what men can, and should, be. Solid and loyal would define him in all ways. Held fast, emotionally stable, spiritually centered, committed, a vessel of dignity and honor, a big hearted lover, infused with a powerful goodness, steady as she goes; compassionate, smart, worldly, honest, true; a real gentleman. The father of the clan. It's odd to realize he's gone. He seemed almost immortal to me; perennial, like the sun; predictable, reliable, constant, like a consistent force of nature. Something that always was, and would always be there. Maybe that's why he seemed immortal because what he represented was an eternal masculine value; the complete man; powerful but gentle. He was as good as we can produce. If he was your friend, you could have no better, for he stood as a rock of protection and refuge for those he loved. He understood humanity and accepted imperfection in others easily. I don't think I would have wanted to be on the receiving end of his fury if ever it was released. But if it was, that fury would be correct and righteous. For this man was fairness personified. There wasn't an abusive bone in his body. He never took out his frustrations or pressures on others. I would one day like to be a man like him. To be that centered in my belief and faith.
My own father died before he could see my life turn around. When I joined AA, and sobered up, Jack became the surrogate for my father; the man I wanted to impress, to show that his faith in me was not lost; that I was growing into a man he could count on and admire as well. I remember making my amends to him for being an out of control drunken child when I worked for him. He should have knocked the shit out of me for some of the crap I pulled, that's what I deserved. But that's not how he operated; and to Jack, any favor done for him or his kin, was never forgotten. He knew that friendship was a thick or thin proposition, and sometimes it hurts to be a friend; but you hold fast to your friends. Jack intuitively understood the great insanities and appetites of young men. He lived without judgment of such things. I remember running into him and Helen at Dominic's one day, I was sober about a year, and I realized I owed him an amends. To tell you the truth, an apology was the least I could do for him. He was so good to me, and I was so angry and defiant in my drinking days. I pulled him aside, and you could see in his eyes, "oh shit, now what?" I said, Jack, I quit drinking a while ago, and I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am for the way I acted when I worked for you. I put out my hand and he took it, and looked at me with such a loving gaze that it touched me at the very heart of myself. I felt the fatherly embrace and pride that one would only bestow upon their own children. The elemental place where the boy is recognized as a man by the father. The ancestral paternal acceptance and love; it set me aglow inside. I felt a primal bound with him from then on. That moment touched the man in me, and moved me away from the child. It was one of the more profound and sublime experiences in my life, and I have always held that moment in a special place in my soul. You see in life, we never know when and where we are going to touch each other with Gods grace. Even apparently trivial encounters can be filled with love and redemption. You see, God gave us each other, for each other. God is so loving that He provided that beauty and healing for me probably from the only person alive who could give it to me, other than my own father, who was already dead. Thank you God for that day, that man, and that moment.
So today, Jack Goggin died. The loss is not only of this one remarkable man, but another of the WWII generation. These men and women, the most irrepressible, powerful, rational, ballsy, selfless, loving, caring, smart, savvy, irreverent, faithful, honorable, strong, steadfast, tough, no time for bullshit, never sweat the small stuff, no body owes me nothin, let's get it done, people the world has ever produced. We didn't just lose Jack, we are losing the spiritual center of our lives, personified by men such as he. For they truly don't build them like that any more. These men stood against the most hideous and pernicious enemies, and endured situations and conditions that are unimaginable to the average person; and they won against all odds. They freed the world and looked what we have done with that freedom. I am embarrassed and disgusted when I see the whining and moaning from a bunch of American coddled brats who haven't produced anything of value, believing they are entitled to everything, but are completely unwilling to work for it. That was America, and I am always reminded when one of these men dies how adrift, goalless, selfish, godless, and directionless we have become. A nation of teat sucking children, demanding, excuse making, unaccountable, irresponsible, corrupt, and morally vacant. The contrast between generations is shockingly stark and profoundly sad to witness. I see my country now and want to weep for what we have become. Without their rational hands to guide us, we are going to be in some real trouble; we are in some real trouble. The older they have gotten, the less their influence has been felt, the more lost we have become as a nation. These men gave everything and asked for nothing; can you even fathom that kind of commitment and sense of duty? So we need to rejoin our souls with these true American heroes, and set our commitment to each other, for our survival depends upon rekindling that spirit. We need to become what Jack represented, the supreme definition of "manhood" and "family." Thank you God for giving us such men as Jack Goggin. This world is less bright, less secure, and less beautiful now that he has gone. But I know Heaven is brighter now that he is there.
Yours in loving kinship,
Mike C.
